JEST CORNER

Musings of an Intern: Murphy’s relevance in Corporate

Well, firstly let’s talk about the topic itself. Musings, few years back this word was quite popular. Musings from holiday retreats of our ex-Prime Minister, Atalji, were a rage in press. Until then I couldn’t dare to associate my writings with the word, but since the poet-politician himself has failed to oblivion, I’ve mustered the courage to write my own version of musings with firm belief that nobody will care to read it and shall not become victim of literary indigestion caused by badly cooked articles.

I have come afresh after my internship in a corporate and was ideally supposed to observe theories given by the likes of Kotlers and Porters, in action. I couldn’t see them happen because I never read how they happened. My out of the book & logic defying thinking always asked for something more, then I came across Murphy’s Laws and understanding corporate functioning became a lot easier. Bottom line is, take the worst case scenario and find the most critical point of time when you don’t want it to happen and then….just helplessly watch it happen.

So, my days at the office started. Initially, I had nothing much to do so I followed simple norm; when you don’t have much to do, walk fast and look worried. I just strolled through the premises all day and accessed the inaccessible because I had most powerful pass with me i.e. a serious look on my face and a clipboard in my hand. Things were running very smoothly but as we all know, to err is human and to forgive is not company policy, I came across my mentor that too at a time when I was chatting at the cost of company bandwidth (meant for official purpose only). Then the ordeal began, daily deliverables were thrust upon my desk and to actually rub it in was sarcastic smile of the mentor and yup I could easily observe direct proportionality between sizes of excel sheets I was given and amount of gala time he was having. Then Murphy came to help, I put on my cubicle notice board, a corollary drawn from Murphy’s Law on inefficiency, nothing motivates you more than an honest day at work by your boss. I won’t elaborate on this point any further but would just like to add that some people have very bad sense of humor, especially when they are at receiving end. After that incident such was the experience that each day I used to think, mother said there would be days like this, but she never said there would be so many.

Days went by and I got used to the daily rigors. On and off I along with my compatriots was given lectures on subjects, found interesting by speaker him/herself only. Ultimately day of days came when I was supposed to give presentation on my project and my evaluation was to be done. But on the back of my head was tried and tested fact that, Murphy’s laws will go into effect at the beginning of an evaluation. Moreover, as a techno manager I had learnt that to err you have to be a human, but to really foul things up requires a computer, and something of similar sort happened to my presentation, thanks to aforementioned combination of factors. First of all version problem sent my animation haywire, then came the stone age configuration of the computer as an impediment, suddenly hyperlinked file was detected with virus and to top it all a subject matter expert of my project’s domain dropped in as he wished to meet my mentor but became really curious after looking at the topic of my project.

The story ends here, because I was trying to make you laugh at my cost. And my financial logic tells me that I’ve already run in to mortgage. I hope you will appreciate my internship musings because Murphy says; you will always get the greatest recognition for the job you least liked.



A Jugular Vein for you all to ponder upon

We don’t claim to have written following poetic expression, just go through and find out how much you fit into it. Actually these lines are lyrics of famous song by country singer Shania Twain titled Ka-Ching (Sound of a cash register).

Materialism galore…. Enjoyy..

We live in a greedy little world--
That teaches every little boy and girl
To earn as much as they can possibly--
Then turn around and
Spend it foolishly
We’ve created us a credit card mess
We spend the money that we don’t possess
Our religion is to go and blow it all
So it’s shoppin’ every sunday at the mall

All we ever want is more
A lot more than we had before
So take me to the nearest store
Can you hear it ring
It makes you wanna sing
It’s such a beautiful thing--ka-ching!
Lots of diamond rings
The happiness it brings
You’ll live like a king
With lots of money and things

When you’re broke go and get a loan
Take out another mortgage on your home
Consolidate so you can afford
To go and spend some more when
You get bored
All we ever want is more
A lot more than we had before
So take me to the nearest store

Can you hear it ring
It makes you wanna sing
It’s such a beautiful thing--ka-ching!
Lots of diamond rings
The happiness it brings
You’ll live like a king
With lots of money and things

Let’s swing
Dig deeper in your pocket
Oh, yeah, ha
Come on I know you’ve got it
Dig deeper in your wallet

All we ever want is more
A lot more than we had before
So take me to the nearest store

Can you hear it ring
It makes you wanna sing
You’ll live like a king
With lots of money and things
Ka-ching!

Finally we got the answer for so many apprehensions that crop up during placement season and why their gist boils down to sarve-sarvah known to one and all as PACKAGE OFFERED.

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